A good—and lasting—marriage must be nurtured.


My husband and I have been married almost 30 years, and now that our children are grown and out of the house, I have to admit we're bored with each other. We loved each other once, but I guess those days are over. Why should we stay together?


One reason I wanted to print your letter is because I hope it will be a warning to younger couples who might otherwise end up on the same road.

After all, a marriage is somewhat like a vegetable garden; unless you tend it and take care of it, the weeds will overwhelm it and insects will devour its fruit. A good marriage doesn’t just happen; it takes work, and it takes commitment. Perhaps someone reading this has allowed their marriage to drift toward the rocks, and if so, I pray you won’t let it happen. The Bible says, “May you rejoice in the wife of your youth” (Proverbs 5:18).

Is it too late for you? No, of course not—not if you turn to God and seek His help for your marriage. What can He do? First, He can give you a new desire to see your marriage healed, as you open your hearts and lives to Christ and allow His love to fill you. Then He will help you find ways to move beyond your boredom and begin to love each other again. And that can happen as you seek to serve each other and make each other happy.

Don’t go down paths that may seem attractive to you right now, but will never give you the happiness you seek. Instead, put your lives and your marriage into Christ’s hands. Then seek out a church where you can grow closer to God, and to each other, as you serve Him.

To put your marriage in Christ’s hands, you must first invite Him into your life. Begin today.