Answers

Q:

Why did God make me such a shy person? I want to make friends and be accepted by people, but whenever I get in a crowd I just freeze up and don't even talk to anyone. Sometimes I wish I was someone else.


A:

We’re all different, and I suppose most of us have looked at someone who seemed more talented or personable than we were, and wished we were in their shoes. But of course we aren’t, and being envious of them never gets us anywhere. Job declared, “Resentment kills a fool, and envy slays the simple” (Job 5:2).

Instead of wishing you were someone else, thank God for making you the person you are. No one else is exactly the way you are—and God had a reason for making you into the unique person you are. For example, over the years I’ve found that people who are self-assured and proud often don’t feel any need for God. Why envy them or wish you were like them? The Bible says, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble” (James 4:6).

At the same time, God wants to help you overcome your shyness and become more confident around others. This probably won’t happen suddenly—but step by step, you can learn to reach out to others and become their friend. All around you are people who may be just like you are—and they’d welcome your friendship.

The most important step you can take, however, is to discover the One who will always be your friend: Jesus Christ. If you have never done so, ask Him to come into your life today. Then ask Him to lead you to a church where you’ll not only grow spiritually, but you can meet others who will value your friendship.