I just found out my husband has been having an affair, and now he's filing for divorce. I guess I'm supposed to be emotionally devastated (like some of my friends have been when they've faced things like this), but in reality I'm just very angry. Is this wrong?


A happy marriage isn’t only based on the love a husband and wife have for each other—important as that is. A happy marriage also needs to be based on mutual trust—and when that trust is broken it almost always yields a bitter harvest of anger, heartache and despair. The Bible warns that adultery’s consequences are “bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword” (Proverbs 5:4).

The most important thing I can tell you is that God understands your pain and your anger, and He wants to help you during this difficult time. What your husband has done is wrong, and he is accountable to God for what he did and the brokenness he has caused. But God loves you, and He wants to assure you of His love and help you get through this—and He will, as you turn to Christ in faith and trust. Invite Him into your life today. Others may betray you—but He never will.

Divorce is somewhat like major surgery; it takes time to heal from it, and you may wonder if the pain will ever end. Begin by asking God to help you focus on the future instead of the past. Focusing only on the past is like picking away at your surgery’s incision, delaying recovery and risking infection.

Don’t let your anger or anything else poison your soul. Instead, ask God to take it away and replace it with His love and trust. The Bible says, “Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord … is the Rock eternal” (Isaiah 26:4).