Answers

Q:

Our divorce finally went through a few months ago, and all my friends say I ought to be delighted since my ex-husband was very abusive and irresponsible. Instead, I find myself very depressed, which doesn't make any sense. Why do I feel this way?


A:

Divorce has sometimes been compared to the death of someone who’s been close to us–and with good reason, because every divorce marks the death of a marriage.

And just as you may grieve over the death of someone who was close to you, you also may find yourself grieving over the death of your marriage. After all, you entered your marriage full of hopes and dreams, looking forward to years of happiness and contentment. And even when things went wrong, in the back of your mind you still may have thought your marriage could be mended. Now, all those hopes are shattered.

There may be other reasons for your feelings, however. For example, you may feel isolated and alone now, and think that no one understands your heartache. You may also dread the future, wondering if your life will always be filled with disappointment or failure. You may even feel guilty over what has happened, blaming yourself for not having been a better spouse.

But listen: God loves you, and He knows all about the pain you are experiencing. More than that, He wants to help you and give you hope for the future. The Bible says, “For I know the plans I have for you … plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). Turn to Christ and commit your life to Him today, and then ask Him to help you walk with Him every day.