My husband and I come from different church backgrounds, and every time we've moved we've had trouble agreeing on a church we both liked. Now we're moving to a new city, and we're facing the same problem all over again. What advice would you have for us?


First of all, I urge you to seek God’s will as you search for a new church. God knows what is best for you, and He is more concerned than you are over this decision. The Bible promises, “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him” (James 1:5).

Then I suggest you both stop and ask yourselves why God wants you to be part of a church. In other words, what does God want to do in your lives through your involvement in a church? Is it simply to find new friends, or to help you become part of a new community, or to be surrounded by something familiar? These may have their place—but God’s deepest desire is for you to grow in your relationship with Him.

Seek, therefore, a church where you and your family can grow spiritually—where the Bible is preached and taught, and where you will have opportunities to worship and serve Christ. Don’t just look for a church that will make you feel “comfortable”; look for one that will challenge you to “grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ” (2 Peter 3:18).

As a footnote, remember that a good marriage often involves a willingness to compromise and adjust to our spouse’s needs and desires. This may even be true as you seek a church.