Answers

Q:

My husband and I got married a year ago. We both have children from our previous marriages, and to be honest, they're about to drive us crazy. The two groups don't get along, and sometimes I wonder if it would be better for us just to split up. What would you say?


A:

Have you ever noticed that what looks like the easy way out of a problem usually turns out to be the wrong way? I suspect this is true in your situation.

In other words, I sincerely hope you won’t take “the easy way out” by ending your marriage after only a year together. Why should you work to keep your family together? First, for the sake of the vows you took when you were married—vows you made not only to each other, but to God. Some people may not take those vows very seriously today—but God does, and I hope you will as well. Jesus said, “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:6).

But I also hope you’ll try to work out these problems for the sake of your children. It may not be easy; second marriages seldom are, especially when children are involved. But they need the security and stability of a loving family, and you and your husband can provide this for them. Don’t see your children as a problem but as an opportunity—an opportunity God has given you to help shape their lives.

You don’t say how old your children are—but if they are old enough to understand, take each of them aside and ask them to help bring harmony to their home. Most of all, put Christ at the center of your lives, and make prayer the heartbeat of your home.