We went through a hard time in our marriage about two years ago, after my husband admitted he'd been having an affair with another woman. It really shattered me. I think I've forgiven him, but how can I ever forget? And how can I ever trust him again? He doesn't know my feelings, but I'm really struggling.
Almost nothing is as devastating and hurtful as being betrayed by a spouse—a spouse who breaks the vow they took on their wedding day and deliberately pursues someone else. They seldom think about it at the moment, but inevitably they leave behind a terrible legacy of anger, hurt and mistrust.
No wonder the Bible says, “Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? … So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished” (Proverbs 6:27, 29). Adultery may be treated lightly by some today, but few things are more serious in God’s eyes. One of the Ten Commandments is absolutely clear: “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14).
My prayer is that you and your husband will rebuild your marriage on a new foundation by committing your lives to Jesus Christ. Make Him the center of your marriage, and let His love fill your hearts and lives. Let His forgiveness cleanse you, and let His will draw you closer together.
Then let me urge you to be honest with your husband and let him know your concerns and feelings. It may not be easy—but hidden pain seldom goes away by itself. With Christ’s help you can get beyond this and discover the joy He intended you to have.